FIX YOUR LOVE-LIFE
By Gavin Aleogho
As I ponder on where to start from in writing this article about love, many things ran through my mind. One of which was the thought of how beautiful our world would have been if man had really understood this popularly used word called LOVE. Can you imagine how families would have been shaped? How our community would have been, if only men understood love.
Even as everybody seeks to be loved; the lack of it has actually turned many to be notorious and live a life of revenge. Some young ladies who have decided to live a life of prostitution; if you check very well you will see that she is doing that out of rejection. She is trying to find love in the wrong place. Whenever a child is denied love at home, he ends up seeking it in the wrong place. The child would look for people who would accept him as he is.
Since everyone seeks to be loved, why don’t we just resolve to love each other and then have a wonderful world? The tragedy is that it is not that easy, but it's possible! This is because of the fallen nature of man. After the fall of Adam and Eve in the Garden of Eden, man became selfish and wicked. Every human that is born thereafter was born into sin, into this selfish nature (Romans 5:12). “As it is written, There is none righteous, no, not one:” (Romans 3:10). It is not possible for a sinful man or an unrighteous mind to genuinely love. Even when they seems to love; if you verify their claim you would still see traces of selfishness in their heart. There is always a string attached to their love. That is just human nature for you. A man tells a woman, “I love you”. Verify his claim; you’ll see that he actually love the woman just because of what he wants to get in return. That is not true love but selfishness.
There is a kind of love which I’ll call the “God-kind” of Love. This is a love that is different from the “human-kind” of love. It is a love that has no trace of greed or selfishness in it. It is pure. It’s a love that can’t be defined by our human dictionary because it’s beyond man scope of knowledge. In Greek language it is call AGAPE; an unconditional love. It is a supernatural love because it has its origin from God. Simply put, it is loving someone not for what he has done or what you hope to get from that person. It’s not a love that depends on some sort of condition. Agape love is unconditional, unqualified and without limit.
On the other hand, human-kind of love is selfish, conditional, two-sided, and filled with limits. It always wants to be pleased. It is conditional and needs reciprocal action. Human-kind of love says, “I’ll go on loving you as long as you don’t do this or that” or “I love you because I feel like loving you”. It is base on feelings and emotion.
You’ll agree with me that even parental love for their children is conditional. They have love (Phileo) for the child because it is their child. Phileo is a Greek word for a kind of love which is based on some sort of relationship or connection. It can be either family or friendship base. There is also Eros, another Greek word for love which is based on sexual relationship. The English word Erotic is derived from Eros. Whether Phileo or Eros; they are both conditional love.
God-kind of love is not dependent on understanding or what you think or feel. It is unconditional without limit; it is one-sided not expecting reciprocity; it is free and other-centred, not self-centred. God-kind of love does not have to receive love to give love. When you love someone the way God loves, you do so regardless of his or her actions. You love him or her through good times and rough times.
God demonstrated this love through His Son on the cross of Calvary. The scripture declares: “But God commendeth his love toward us, in that, while we were yet sinners, Christ died for us.” (Romans 5:8). We were nothing when God sent His son to die for us. God send His son to die for us not because of any selfish interest. It doesn’t make God more “God” than He is; rather it’s just for our good that He did what He did. This is the kind of love that God is calling every Kingdom minded Believer to. A love-life that is unconditional.
You’re are to show this unconditional love to everyone; including those you may consider undeserving of this love. Actually, when it comes to this love; you consider everyone the same not considering culture, religion, race, status, denominational or family background. It doesn’t matter whether they are born again or not. Jesus said, in Matthew 5:44: “…Love your enemies, bless them that curse you, do good to them that hate you, and pray for them which despitefully use you, and persecute you.”
I’ve met Believers who say they can’t love some people because of some reasons. Maybe they’ve been hurt by these individuals. But no matter the hurt or the crime they’ve committed against them; I tell you, if they are Believers, they still have the ability to love someone that has wronged them. The simply reason is because every Believer has this God-kind of love in him/her. It was imparted to us when we got born again. The scripture declares, “… the love of God is shed abroad in our hearts by the Holy Ghost which is given unto us.” (Romans 5:5a).
This love is not easily offended. Though, offence will definitely come as Our Lord Jesus said in Matthew 18:7. But this love is not easily provoked or irritated (1 Corinthians 13:5). When you are easily provoked, it is a sign you are yet to mature in this Love. It shows you need to work on your love-life.
I believe that this God-kind of love is the foundation for living a victorious life. It is the only solution to living a life without stress. Believers are expected to live by faith. Faith is a vital requirement for a successful and victorious life. But let me remind you that the fuel that “faith” requires to work is “love”. If your love-life is not fixed; your faith will not produce result. Galatians 5:6b reads: “…faith which worketh by love.” Love is greater than faith and hope (1 Corinthians 13:13).
Can you see how many people have been robbed of their expectation simply because their love-life is not okay? Believers tell you that they are having faith for some things in their life and even in their ministries. If their love-life is not okay; they will never have what they are trusting God for. It doesn’t matter if there is no relationship with what they are having faith for and who they’ve decided not to love. Nothing in the kingdom of God will work on your behalf if you fail to fix your love-life.
Jesus Christ said something significant about this love, he said, “…Thou shalt love the Lord thy God with all thy heart, and with all thy soul, and with all thy mind. This is the first and great commandment. And the second is like unto it, Thou shalt love thy neighbour as thyself. On these two commandments hang all the law and the prophets.” (Matthew 22:37-40).
From this scripture, we see that everything in life hangs on these two commandments. Just imagine love as a rod where you hang your clothes. On these commandments of love hangs faith, healing, deliverance, all the promises of God, prosperity and even answered prayer. If the rod is alright then whatever you hang on it will remain. Likewise, if your love-life is intact, then the rest of your life will be intact.
Every law and the fulfilment of every prophesy or promises of God depend on how whole you are in this love. If your prosperity hasn’t manifested yet, check your love-life. Many ministers seek to be used by God. If their love-life is not fixed, they will never experience any miracle through their hands. These are the two important links that unite God to man, man to his fellows, and man again to God. “Love is the fulfilling of the law”, says Apostle Paul in Romans 13:10b.
You will be wasting your time trying to manifest spiritual gifts without love, because love is the motivating force for every spiritual gift (1 Corinthians 13). Without love, your spiritual gifts will fail (1 Corinthians 13:1-4, 8). Always remember that God, who is the anointing Giver is Love; so it is a necessity for you to walk in Love (God) for the full manifestation of the anointing of the Spirit.
As a Christian, the development of your love walk must be your primary focus. Failure to develop this God-kind of love will cause you to be weak in character and it will adversely affect every area of your life. Never forget that your refusal to love is a refusal to express the character of God to the world. This weakness is what will hinder you from experiencing the manifestation of God's goodness in your life.
One major blockage to the flow of this love is selfishness. Selfishness is like the inverse of love. It’s a force that works against the manifestation of the God-kind of love. You must deal with the spirit of selfishness in your life. Pride, Fear and doubt are rooted in selfishness. Pride is doing things your way instead of God's way and it always leads to your downfall. Love and selfishness are the most powerful forces in the world. When we continue to pursue our will instead of God's will for our lives, we are in pride and operating in selfishness. Love activates the law of life in Christ Jesus and pride and selfishness activate the law of sin and death.
I believe strongly that the mark of a true child of God is Love (John 13:35). Without this love in your heart, you are still spiritually dead (1 John 3:14-15). When we make Jesus the Lord of our lives, we pass from spiritual death to life. Our love for one another is the proof of our spiritual transition. A Believer, who does not love his fellow Believers in spite of the difference in personality or denomination, is still spiritually dead. In other words, he is not really born-again.
God has commanded us to love one another, even those who are difficult to love. We must forgive others as an act of our will. Forgiveness should never be a burden. The mark of a true Christian is the ability to love unconditionally. We honour God when we love the way He has instructed us to love.
Finally, never forget that if you walk in love towards people, they’ll be compelled sooner or later to respond the same way, because love begets love. And also, the way you relate to others determine how God relates to you. The degree to which you are rooted and grounded in God’s love determines the degree to which you express all the fullness of God (Ephesians 3:16-20). This is because love is the spiritual root to all the positive manifestations in your life. So, your level of maturity in love determines the degree to which God is able to manifest Himself in your life.
YOUR WORST ENEMY
I have learnt of many young ladies who have hurriedly married the wrong person because of the fear that if they do not marry then, they may not marry again and beside, time is not on their side. So, they just settled for the less instead of trusting and waiting for the best. Some might argue that it is impatience; but I summit to you that impatience has its root in fear. Business opportunities have come to many people, but because of fear, they refused to venture into it, thereby forfeiting the profit they would have made. Children have been raised wrongly because their parent fear that if they handle them much harder, they would become wild and lost their children’s love and trust for them. Likewise, I know of some who have refused to further their education because they fear they would run out of cash in the nick of time and will not be able to complete it. These are just but a few of the havoc that has been cause by FEAR over the ages.
Can you take a quick look at your life and see what fear has done to you? Are you supposed to be where you are now? What is keeping you in that job; is it fear of the unknown world? What is your motivation in life? Do you act based on fear? There is a big difference between doing your work out of fear of losing it and doing the same out of fulfilment. Doing your job out of fear of losing it will keep you in bondage; bondage of your boss and the work at hand. This is similar to a guy or lady who despite the warning signal in their relationship decides to go ahead into marriage simply because of the fear that if he loses that person he or she won’t get another. Fear puts you in bondage. Is the fear of making mistake or being wrong keeping you from God’s best? See, fear will destroy your confidence and leave you powerless.
Fear is increasing in the world like never before. It is prophetical and scriptural. Jesus said in this Last Days, men’s hearts will fail them because of fear (Luke 21:25-26, 28). The uncertainties in our world, economy and even in the speeches of our leaders are all sign to this fact. This is actually an indication that Jesus’ return is near.
The fear of the future; the fear of tomorrow which is rooted in the fear of the unknown is a major fear that tends to affect more than 80% of humans. Fear of failure, fear of sickness, fear of lack, fear of making mistake, fear of death, fear of rejection, fear of not having enough money to pay the bills, fear that the same calamity that once affected some members of their family will get a hold of them too. These are just but few things many fear will come their way or come to them.
Fear fosters restlessness, anxiety, insecurity, sluggish metabolism and even insomnia. Negative emotions like worry, anxiety, criticism and anger are all fear-based. Fear dominates people’s thoughts. It controls their lives by the decisions they make, often keeping them from ever stepping out and doing the things God has called them to do. I just think of the case when God called Father Abraham to what we may call a life of uncertainty. Abraham was in fact called out of his people, land, plans, and his position, to a place where he has never been to or knows what will be the outcome. He responded to the call. It takes a fearless life to yield to this call.
We live in a world where the fearless reign while the fearful are enslaved. One of the reasons conquerors win every battle is because they are fearless. As a result, they are able to perform great exploits. On the other hand, people who walk in fear are slaves and are powerless against Satan. Fear is a spirit that must be resisted.
Fear is actually the reverse or reciprocal of faith. Fear is a spiritual force that operates like faith but in the reverse. While faith is the substance of things hoped for, the evidence of things not seen; fear on the other hand is the reverse. When you operate by fear, you expect negative things to happen to you; eventually they will.
Fear opposes the Word of God. Whereas faith is rooted in the Word of God; it comes by hearing the Word of God. Fear comes by hearing the words of the devil. Fear of any kind gives Satan access to our lives. It is a demonic spirit, and we must refuse it with all our might.
Bear in mind, faith connects you to what you believe in God's Word. Fear connects you to whatever you are afraid of. The things you fear will always come. Job attested to this fact in Job 3:25. Job said, “For the thing which I greatly feared is come upon me, and that which I was afraid of is come unto me.” When you fear failure; the probability of you failing at that point is more than 50%. Many people that go into marriage with the fear of divorce perhaps because their parents or guardians were divorced always end up experiencing what they fear. Fear gives access to the devil into your life to enforce what you fear.
I believe the end of fear has come in your life. “For God hath not given us the spirit of Fear; but of power, and of love, and of a sound mind.” (2 Timothy 1:7). God loves you; He doesn’t want you to be in that cage of fear. That spirit of fear is not from Him.
On the Sermon on the Mount (Matthew 6:25-34), Jesus talked about the futility of worry and anxiety. Worry actually has its root in fear. It comes because of the fear of tomorrow.
Actually, the life we have been called to live is a life of risk. By that, I imply it is a life whereby you do not know what will be the next minute or the next day. Nobody knows tomorrow. There is every reason to be afraid in this world. That is why God in His infinite mercy has called us to this life of FAITH. Hebrews 10:38a reads: “Now the just shall live by faith:” Have faith in yourself. Have faith in God. Have faith that tomorrow would be better. Every venture in life that has yielded great results was given birth to by men and women of faith. Fear prevented the great warriors of king Saul from even attempting to fight the giant Goliath, but faith gave David the courage to fight and even defeated him.
The problem is that, so many believers fail to recognize how fear is at work in them. There are many ways the devil tries to penetrate your life with fear. One of such ways you might fall prey to the power of fear is by allowing the devil to remind you of your past. Reminding you of the negativities of the past is one of the greatest tricks of the devil to keep you from living an overflowing life. The devil brings an inventory of your past mistakes, past failure, broken dreams and promises, piled up bills and problems. If he cannot bring your past on any issue on ground, he will bring up the bad experience of somebody you hold on high esteem. This is simply the devil’s old trick which he has been using for ages.
Don’t ever forget that God is concerned about your future, while the devil is all about your past. The devil, your enemy will do all he can to get you to focus on “where you’ve been”, “what you’ve gone through”, “how you’ve failed”, “how you were cheated” and “how you were not able to make it” instead of “where you are going” and “how things can change for the better”.
Luke 9:62 reads, “…No man, having put his hand to the plough, and looking back, is fit for the kingdom of God.” When you keep looking back in life; you will never experience the full life God has for you. I’ve met many people who blame their present situation on their parents who have either refused to train them or give them the necessary assistance they required. You can’t live life like that. Apostle Paul says one major thing he does is that he forgets those things that are behind…so that he can forged ahead. “… But this one thing I do, forgetting those things which are behind, and reaching forth unto those things which are before,” (Philippians 3:13).
Most times, the fear of the future comes because of past experiences. If you have tried to accomplish something and it failed; don’t give up if it is something God has put in your heart. You have to forget your past failure and try again. Fear gives in but faith presses on! If you have given up walking because when you were trying to walk in your tender age you fell many times; I’m sure you won’t have been walking by now.
Another way of overcoming this satanic deadly weapon called fear is by filling your heart with God’s word. This is one effective way that has been proven to handle the spirit of fear. As you fill your heart with God’s word, faith builds up in you which in turn repels fear. Fear disappears by hearing God’s word. Go get a hold on Spirit inspired messages and books. Your bible should not be left out. All these will help you to build your faith.
When you know that God is on your side and more especially that He loves you, there won’t be any room for fear in your life (Psalm 34:1-4). Actively believe and receive God’s love for your life. If He loves you so much to give His only son for you; He will likewise with that give you everything that you require. Never forget that God loves you unconditionally; His love doesn’t depend on your righteousness.
Walking in God’s love daily will shield you from fear. Loving others unconditionally, even when it is difficult is another sure way of living the fearless life. The scripture declares: “There is no fear in love; but perfect love casteth out fear: because fear hath torment. He that feareth is not made perfect in love.” (1 John 4:18).
Resist fear and refuse to allow it to dominate your life. One thing is sure; the devil will always throw arrows of fear at you, but with the shield of faith (Ephesians 6:16), you can repel it. Never accommodate fear whenever it comes, because it will always come. Resist the spirit of fear by speaking out the word of God. Daily confession of God’s word will help. Speak the word of God to yourself always.
Proverbs 4:23 reads, “Keep thy heart with all diligence; for out of it are the issues of life.” Guard your heart. Take authority over your mind. Never give a place for the devil. You must understand that the devil can inject thoughts of fear into your mind just the same way a doctor can inject medicine into your body. Don’t build a comfortable environment for fear by what goes into your mind. Avoid negative people and environment which tends to fuel fear in you.
Never forget that faith and fear cannot operate at the same time. You are either operating in faith or fear. Check the various areas in your life and find out which one is operating there. FAITH or FEAR?
IGNITERS INTERANATIONAL BIBLE BEE (IIBB)
The Bible is a
voluminous and important book. It’s a guide for mankind given to man by God.
Though, it is not always easy to read or understand; and to some it can be
wearisome. That is why IIBB designs programs; providing entertaining way of
helping to discover more of what is in the Bible and encouraging participants
to look more deeply into passages of the Scripture. IIBB shows you that the Bible
is not just rewarding, exciting and impactful but it is also relevant and fun.
Through healthy
competition we encourage our participants to read and meditate on the Holy
Scriptures (Bible) and live out the Word of God on a daily basis which will
guarantee a purposeful and impactful living.
We design
exciting Bible bee programs which include but not limited to
v Bible Quiz
v Bible Recitation
v Bible spelling bee
v Article Contest
v Preaching Contest
v Scripture survivor of the fittest etc.
With the
awarding of prizes we encourage participants to prayerfully and diligently
study God’s Word with the aim that they will eventually seek to place the Word
of God in their hearts, mind, and lives through the medium of healthy and godly
competition.
IIBB helps
individuals to establish a life-long pattern of discipleship in God's Word. The
entire program is designed to be enjoyable and exciting as we encourage,
recognize, and reward diligence in Bible study, Scripture memorization, and
prayer.
The King James
Version of the Bible is a major version that we use. But as occasions demands
for better reading and clarity we use other versions of the Bible which will be
communicated to the participants.
MISSION
Raising a generation of people whose heart is saturated
and guarded by the Word of God for effective and purposeful living as Christ’s
representatives.
VISION
Is to see the Church of our Lord Jesus Christ rise up
with a deep desire, disciple and determination to know more of God via
cultivating an attitude of serious studying of God’s Word.
Goal/Objectives of IIBB
1. To encourage participants to memorize God’s Word.
2. To develop within participants a love for God’s Word.
3. To encourage participants to have a closer
relationship with God.
4. To develop an attitude of discipline in the lives of
participants.
5. To cultivate an attitude of studying God’s Word.
6. To spur participants up via godly competition.
Anchor Scriptures
Isaiah 11:9
“They shall
not hurt nor destroy in all my holy mountain: for the earth shall be full of
the knowledge of the LORD, as the waters cover the sea.”
IIBB Competition Structure
Knowing that there is no better way to strengthen ones
relationship with our Lord Jesus Christ except a life grounded in the Word of
God which is the Bible. IIBB is structure in such a way that fits diverse age
group which is not limited to children and teenagers. The competition is also
structure to include adults’ package, family package, youth packages, schools
package, community package etc. So, regardless of your age or status in life
IIBB offers one the opportunity to enter into a serious study of the Scripture.
What IIBB is not
v Is not a church.
v Is not a denominational organization.
v Is not a profit making organization.
Financing IIBB
IIBB expenses and prize is gotten from voluntary
support and contribution by individuals, families and corporate organization.
Partnership
You can be a part of what God is doing via IIBB in the
following ways:
1. Financial Support.
2. Provision of awards, gift materials etc.
3. Voluntary helper in preparation and during IIBB
programs.
4. Becoming an adviser and a counsellor to IIBB body.
5. Giving IIBB a field. That is, providing a platform
like a Church school or community where we can organize a Bible base
competition.
20 Benefits of Participating in IIBB
1.
It helps to
develop good study habits.
2.
It helps in
learning how to concentrate.
3.
It helps to
develop patience.
4.
It helps in
developing determination.
5.
It helps in
learning how to persist
6.
It helps in
learning self-discipline.
7.
It helps to
acquire pure mind and pure heart.
8.
It helps in
acquiring respect for authority.
9.
It helps to
develop team spirit.
10.
It helps to
develop prayer life.
11.
It enriches
personal relationships.
12.
It helps the
brain in responding quickly and logically to questions.
13.
It develops the
spirit of sportsmanship.
14.
It fosters
humility.
15.
It deepens
dependence on God.
16.
It develops good
stewardship attitude.
17.
It built the
spirit of dedication to complete a task.
18.
It unifies the
Body of Christ, the Church.
19.
It helps to
develop godly character.
20.
It helps to know
ones capability.
Gavin Aleogho
(IIBB Coordinator)
(IIBB Coordinator)
Photo Album of IIBB December, 2015 SCC Children/Teen Edition
Photo Gallery by QuickGallery.com
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