Okhai did not grow up planning to ruin his destiny. He only believed he was defending his mother.
He was raised in a home where conflict was constant. Arguments were frequent, and over time, his mother carefully painted his father as the villain in the marriage. Young, emotionally attached, and unaware of manipulation, Okhai absorbed this narrative without question.
One evening, when he was just 15 years old, an argument escalated beyond control. In a moment of anger and misplaced loyalty, Okhai physically confronted his father while defending his mother. His father was injured as a result of the push from his son. In the heat of the moment, Okhai spoke abusive words that should never be spoken to a parent. Honour was broken.
That incident eventually led to the separation of his parents, with Okhai and his sister going with their mother. Shortly afterwards, his father died, and the door for apology and reconciliation closed forever against the young lad.
Life moved on, but progress did not. Years passed, yet Okhai’s life seemed trapped in a cycle of frustration. Opportunities appeared and collapsed mysteriously. Relationships failed repeatedly. His effort never translated into results.
At 43, after giving his life to Christ, during a season of deep reflection, conviction struck him powerfully. That painful day with his father returned vividly, and Scripture echoed loudly in his heart:
“Honour your father and your mother, that it may be well with you”
(Ephesians 6:2–3)
In that moment, Okhai realised a painful truth. What he had once justified as love was actually dishonour. And dishonour opens doors. A curse had been activated—not by witchcraft, but by violating divine order.
THE UNCOMFORTABLE TRUTH ABOUT CURSES
This is why many Christians struggle. We love the language of blessings, but we are uncomfortable with the reality of curses. Yet Scripture leaves no room for denial. Curses are real. They are spiritual consequences that can follow a person and even affect generations unborn, until there is a genuine encounter with Christ.
A Warri pidgin proverb captures it well:
“Pesin wey dem pray still dey boot, he never still better for am.
What about pesin wey dem curse?”
If a blessed person is still struggling to make progress, imagine the weight of one who is living under a curse.
Curses are real, and you must avoid anything that brings a curse upon your life. The Lord says:
“I have set before you life and death, blessing and cursing; therefore choose life.”
(Deuteronomy 30:19)
Curses are not emotional statements. They are outcomes of violated spiritual laws.
COMMON WAYS PEOPLE INVITE CURSES UNKNOWINGLY
1. Oppressing the Poor and Helpless
“He who oppresses the poor reproaches his Maker.”
(Proverbs 14:31)
God identifies with the afflicted, and He consistently rises to defend the cause of the helpless.
2. Fighting or Dishonouring a Genuine Servant of God
Miriam became leprous for speaking against Moses (Numbers 12). Spiritual authority is not to be treated lightly; mishandling it can result in self-inflicted consequences.
3. Dishonouring Parents
Honour carries a promise, but dishonour against parents carries its consequences which you must avoid (Ephesians 6:3).
4. Handling Sacred Things Dishonestly
In 1 Samuel 2:12–17, the sons of Eli abused priestly offerings, and judgement followed. Thus, 1 Corinthians 3:16–17 warns, “If anyone defiles the temple of God, God will destroy him.”
5. Becoming a Stumbling Block to Someone on a Godly Mission
This was the sin of the Amalekites against Israel during their journey to the Promised Land. Jesus warned:
“Woe to him through whom offences come.”
(Matthew 18:7)
6. Lying or Manipulating to Destroy Families or Friendships
“These six things the Lord hates… one who sows discord among brethren.”
(Proverbs 6:16–19)
God takes seriously anything that destroys unity, relationships, or families through deceit and manipulation, for:
“Lying lips are an abomination to the Lord.”
(Proverbs 12:22)
7. Repaying Evil to Those Who Have Done You Good
“Whoever rewards evil for good, evil will not depart from his house.”
(Proverbs 17:13)
Returning evil for good invites a curse because it violates the law of honour and gratitude.
8. Trusting in Man Instead of God
“Cursed is the man who trusts in man and makes flesh his strength.”
(Jeremiah 17:5)
Idolatry is the act of exalting anything above God. When you exalt a mere man and place your trust in human strength rather than God, you disconnect yourself from divine help and favour.
9. Injustice and Perverting Judgement
“Cursed is the one who perverts the justice due the stranger, the fatherless, and the widow.”
(Deuteronomy 27:19)
God stands firmly against injustice, especially when power is used to oppress others.
10. Breaking Covenants, Agreements, and Vows
“…lest wrath be upon us because of the oath which we swore to them.”
(Joshua 9:18–20)
The Israelites, under Joshua’s leadership, understood this truth and honoured their covenant with the Gibeonites to avoid wrath.
Covenants and vows are sacred, and breaking them attracts divine displeasure.
RECOGNISING THE SIGNS OF A CURSE
Curses do not announce themselves. They often manifest as repeated delays, unexplained hardship, or recurring cycles of loss resulting from wrong decisions. What Okhai experienced for years was not random; it was the harvest of a moment of disobedience.
This is not written to instil panic, but to provoke sober self-examination. Consider these questions carefully:
1. Am I operating under a curse?
2. Is there a recurring pattern of delay, loss, or frustration in my life without a clear explanation?
3. Have I dishonoured a parent, authority figure, or destiny helper without repentance?
4. Am I handling sacred things carelessly?
5. Have my actions caused someone’s calling, relationship, or progress to stumble?
UNDERSTANDING GOD'S REDEMPTIVE PLANS
It is important to understand that a born-again child of God can place himself or herself under a curse by violating the principles of God’s Kingdom.
While a believer cannot be cursed in the redemptive sense, since Christ has settled that. However, redemption does not cancel divine principles. When Kingdom laws are violated, consequences follow.
Scripture is clear:
“Do not be deceived, God is not mocked; for whatever a man sows, that he will also reap.”
(Galatians 6:7)
The Corinthian believers experienced sickness and even death because of abuse of holy ordinances (1 Corinthians 11:29–30). These were not unbelievers; they were covenant people.
A FINAL EXHORTATION
Like a plague, avoid anything that can bring a curse upon your life. Do not introduce unnecessary battles into your children’s lives. Do not live in ways that activate spiritual forces against you. Instead, choose actions that release blessings upon your life and your lineage.
The good news is that Christ still redeems. Through genuine repentance and a cry for mercy, curses can be broken.
Choose honour.
Choose obedience.
Choose life.
And deliberately live in ways that release blessings upon you.
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